Polit-Economic Satire 2 1

First edition of Political economic satire found its way to the
hearts of the readers pretty soon. It is said that economics is
complicated and boring subject. It is not twofaced and doublenatured; instead it has many faces and many hands like Buddha.
Even economists do not trust each other and thus one cannot two
economists praising each other in the whole world. This especially
might be said about Georgia. Everybody, here is inborn fathers of
economics and experts of final instance (though nobody have ever
seen them to be in a relation with mothers of economy).
Have you though that I would say priest? No, this word is not
fashionable in Georgia any more. Now it is in fashion to say –
experts. Therefore, we have experts in abundance and we hatch
young experts by color, size and purpose like chickens. Moreover,
we included wonders of genetic engineering and achieved brilliant
success – we hatch experts of high breeding. The case even came
down to cloning of some celebrated experts. Thus, the same expert is
successfully working in various fields by means of clones. Georgia is
a country of experts, revolutions and economic ratings. In recent
years, I have been cooperating with foreigners. I am a representative
of ABLOY, Saint-Gobain corp. (Weber-Vetonit) in Caucasus. So, I
frequently have to travel in Europe and Southern Caucasus.
Everybody is going mad and claim that they have never seen an
economy written on the paper. We overshadowed Singapore in
ratings, but we drop behind with Nicaragua in consumption level and
volume of market, together with CPI and PPI indices! They are
asking the same – where are your economists? I’m fed up with you!-
I told them. In response they told me an anecdote: “Three hunters
were boasting of their booties. One said that recently he caught such
a big fish that the head was in the end of village and tail was in the
beginning. When it came to evisceration, we called people from
metro construction.” The second hunter said: “Once I went in a grove
for hunting after rabbits and while I was chasing them, suddenly I
saw a deer. I shot and killed it. I was dragging the deer and suddenly
I saw ranger Jorjoliani. He wanted to arrest me. What could I do, I
shot him too. Now I was dragging both of them and I met patrolling
273Tamaz Alania. He also wanted to arrest me and thus I had no choice
but to kill him. Now I was dragging all of them near Aragvi bank and
I saw bus full of tourists near Tsitelsofeli, they were going to Bejana
to eat Mtsvadi (Georgian national dish). Suddenly third hunter
shouted to the first one, Temur Kurashvili – Shorten your fish or
Nabucco pipe, or Natchkebia will kill whole bus of tourists.
So, foreigners advised to shorten our ratings. However, we cannot
do this – as it is our style!
People say he is a cool boy, but… and then it begins: those who
know nothing about debit-credit are criticizing our knowledge of
accounting. Those who were made to repeat a year three times,
criticize our manner of writing, or those who appropriated student’s
yearly essay and claimed that it was his scientific work. The truth is
one – in economics and politics, the more they criticize you the
tougher you are. Recall “One Hundred Years of Solitude” by
Marquez. People are born and then disappear and nobody notices this
even in their homes. Naturally some of them create epoch and bullets
and slush are aimed at them! – Nobody shoots a quail, until it flies
away, a poet said once. However, this beautiful bird has never
changed its mind about flying away. It has beautiful and brave
nature, so it lives in the field, fusses and keeps own household, just
like economists. Just like quail, economists fly away when they feel
that it’s necessary to do this. We have been walking in the fields
already ten years. During these times, we searched, wrote, tried to fly
away. They were praising, criticizing, and slandering us. We fell and
rise again. We had hard times – but we have never cried and always
said our say.
Five years have passed since first publishing of the book and I
decided to lay it before you, my readers once again, and thus see how
far we have ability of foretelling. How far our thinking and economic
laboratory are close to the truth. One thing is obvious – people and
time are wise and fair. Time will put everything in its own place, this
might be painful and delayed but this will happen anyway. I tried to
say something new, and I added new letter to old ones. I tried to
make my friends laugh and you decide whether I succeeded in this or
not. I am ready for criticism.
I have never pronounced eulogy on somebody. Some people claim
274that I did. I am interested when and where? Oh, you do not know
exactly? But, there is no sun without shadow and I am not innocent
either. I am an ordinary economist; sometimes I boast with my
achievements; I have my enemies, slander, truth and ethnicity. I do
not want nation’s spirit and identity to be sacrificed to globalization.
I neither want these things to become obstacles on the way of
nations’ development at globalization arena. Recently, I was reading
book by my favorite author, economist and journalist, Robert
Heilbroner – The Worldly Philosophers. The book has second title
also – life and activities of greatest economist-thinkers. Robert says
that economists have never ruled armies, they have never been
commanders-in-chief or emperors, they have never sent people to
scaffolds, and they have never been heroes of history textbooks.
However, empires and continents were destroyed because of their
actions. Sometimes they toppled down heads of the states and
sometimes they ascended them. Upon their call, one class of a
society confronted another, one nation confronted another. All this
happened not because of their plans, cruelty or evilness, but because
of strength of their cosmic ideas. Robert reckons that economists are
like shadows of the past. Even alive, they live behind the scenes;
they think, create models and carry out experiments on society
without their awareness. They are preparing revolution and tsunami,
like the recent crisis.
Robert says – “There is a saying that economics doubtlessly is an
important science, ruled and not very attractive. This idea is not true.
Those who think this way, forget that economics leads people to
barricades. Economy creates nameless and strong party that cannot
be bribed; one cannot compromise or punish it”. The same – that
happens in Georgia is a result of economics.
“Theories of great economists changed the world and their
mistakes appeared to be disastrous for mankind” – I reckon that these
words of Heilbroner are all-time and universal. These words are
actual especially for Georgia, at every stage of reformatory, postreformatory and anti-reformatory phases during last 15 years.
I have been lecturing at Tbilisi State University for twenty years.
Therefore, I was moving in economists’ circle during this period.
275All the time, I was hearing endless claims: a) If the things were going
well for politicians and for people (I even do not remember such
times), they were claiming that economists know nothing. If the
things were going bad everybody was asking – b) where are
economists?! This phrase has no time or homeland. So, economists
of whole world have the same fate – they are trusted by halves and
fully blamed! That’s cool! That is why economists are fed up to be
in this position. So tragedy grew into comedy and we got satire.
In this way, people better understand boring issues or researches of
economists. They cry, laugh, sometimes they call me and tell me that
they really enjoyed the reading. So, for me this is my Oscar and
Nobel. This is the prize and praise of researcher. If, in these
interesting times, I managed to ease tension of your nervous system
strained like strings of Chonguri (Georgian national musical
instrument) and you enjoyed it, well I thank God, my aim is reached.
Entrust to Robert, economics is not such a boring thing at all.
Associate Professor at Business and Economics department of
Tbilisi State University
Ph.D Emzar Jgerenaia
And the last thing, I recalled Keynes’ words –Practical men, (famous
businessmen) who reckon that they are not influenced intellectually,
as a rule are slaves of some celebrated economist of the past.
John Maynard Keynes, The General Theory Of Employment, Interest
and Money, p. 383


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